Skip to main content

Life of Lu 24/08/14

This is the maiden blog from my fancy swanky new phone.
I have no idea what autocorrects I will miss or what format it will be in but feck it.... I may as well try to pretend I live in a world of technology again!


The life of Lu has been pretty roller coaster like in the past few weeks. I have gone over some personal highs and lows but thankfully I am now seeing the light and it's glimmer of hope at the end of the tunnel. 

Something strange happens when you stumble into a new decade. Unaware that it is happening you begin to look at life a bit differently.  You begin to reflect on the decade before, choices you made, lessons you learnt.  You start to appreciate the people in your life a bit more and try to surround yourself with those who give you a little bit of joy and a large amount of laughter. It is laughter that got me out of my little rut.

I have been so lucky since I've moved to Scotland.  I have made some wonderful friends, done ok in my job, surrounded myself at every possible opportunity with kilted men with rolling 'r's. But every now and then you meet people who for some unknown reason affect you a little differently. 

This week has been filled with friends, laughter and a couple of surprises (mam, if you are reading this, I'll be in touch tomorrow to say thanks). This week has just been such a tonic. I have gotten to know (and consequently adore) some friends a lot better. I have started writing again. I have even started listening to music again! 

I was feeling quite lonely and if I'm honest, very sorry for myself. Sometimes despite all my friends here, the loneliness can be overpowering. I guess it is the downside of coming out of a long term relationship.  I miss the intimacy of having someone with me. This week I went for a few drinks with a friend and I don't know when I enjoyed myself so much last. It was so nice to sit and laugh and chat and realise that I'm not weird for feeling how I do. To let myself go and enjoy someone's company completely. 

The big thing that came from this week is how I see myself.  I have spent so long feeling like a failure for mistakes made that I stopped caring about myself.  I've let my weight balloon, I've stopped putting the effort in because I no longer saw the point. I now see the point. I want to do it for me but the profound thought that came from this week is that if I don't love me and care for me then why should I expect anyone else to? 

The next few months are going to about Lu. I plan to finish 2014 with a bang and with a lot of twirling. 

To all my friends who have helped me this week, thank you. You are the ones who have started me on this more personal journey. Xx

Comments

  1. I feel lousy, I haven't been a very good friend lately. I'm sorry you've been feeling this way. I am glad you've had the chance to get out and feel joy again. Sometimes loving yourself and caring for yourself is the hardest thing, and feels nearly impossible. I've been feeling a little like that too. Really I just suck at following through with any goals I have set for myself.

    Let's chat soon. I love you Lu. You're beautiful inside and out. ALSO I've thoroughly enjoyed your snap chats lately. I like to see your face.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tif! Don't feel bad! That wasn't the point of what I wrote! I love you too, my fabulous friend xx

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Let's talk about mental health

I must admit I am a little bit nervous about writing this blog today.
I am afraid that I will get a little too emotional when writing about a topic that is very close to my heart.
I will apologise now for if I ramble or get lost in a stream of consciousness. I hope you can make sense of what I am about to write.

This week, another life was lost to the tragedy that is suicide. I should correct myself, a famous life was lost to suicide. I have no doubt that this week, many families around the world are grieving and trying to figure out why one of their own has taken their own life.

The reason that I want to write this post is simply down to the number of horrible and ignorant comments that I have read on social media about Chester Bennington's death. For me, it highlighted the lack of understanding of mental health in this day and age.

I'm going to take you back on a wee journey with me and tell you why this is such a personal topic and why I feel that it needs to be spoken abou…

Life of Lu - thankfuls 10/09/2017

Today is the first official day of my holidays from work, and truth be told they couldn't come at a better time. I am tired, exhausted even and full of doubt about what my future holds for a number of reasons. So, I thought to myself, what a perfect time to write a list of thankfuls to remind me of all the truly wonderful things I have in my life.

1. I am thankful for my team at work. I have a store team of about 50 and a management team of 6. I don't particularly enjoy talking about work online, as it isn't really appropriate but I am so thankful for my team. Every day they are a fountain of support, and their enthusiasm never ceases to amaze me. They are my reason for going to work every day, and I count my lucky stars that I have been given the team that I have. They make the tough days better and the good days great.

2. I am thankful for my Cambridge Consultant, Claire. 4 weeks ago I started on a rather scary journey of self improvement. I found Claire, spoke to her ab…

Moving on.

I realised something the other day. That is not nearly specific enough or dramatic enough for this story. Let me start again...
I had a startling realisation the other day. I think Scotland and I are starting to go our separate ways (and I am not talking about Brexit) I was in Glasgow a few weeks ago, and I went on a tourist bus tour. I actually went on it twice, and I loved it. I got to see all the attractions I have wanted to see over the years: The Cathedral, the Necropolis, The Transport Museum, The People's Palace. It was very similar to something I did just before I left Edinburgh, my own little way of saying goodbye. When I got on the train home, I realised that in my own wee way, I was saying goodbye to Glasgow. Other than a course there on the 11th of May, I have no idea when I am going to be there next. I have no gigs booked, my upcoming flights to Ireland are all from Edinburgh.  I feel rather sad that my attachment to Glasgow has severed. In my head it was where I would…